Keeping up with the pace

It's been an interesting 'holiday' weekend.

I got 5 days off with virtually perfect weather and no real plans to tie me down to anything. It was glorious. Spontaneous bonfires, much catching up with friends I haven't seen in the past few months, a fun time with family, and even finally got working on a secret project for my brother that I've had started for well over a year now. I'll post pics when I finally give it to him, because I'm expecting it to turn out awesome.

I'm comfortable saying I've beaten my cold and am back to about 95% health. My HP bar is full enough to continue on my way without stopping to continue to fill it.

I'm actually ahead (comparably to where I've been) in my financial situation at the moment.

I'll be taking my typewriter and going to my cabin in the woods this coming weekend to knock out 4 chapters of my yet to be started book and hopefully have enough to submit to a week-long workshop I want to go to that's taking place in the fall.

Nothings really wrong at the moment.

It's like a breath is being held while the shoe is in the air dropping. I don't know... I suppose we'll just have to see what happens...

In an interesting twist of male/female relations I actually met someone over the weekend who I am genuinely intrigued by. I'm certainly not attempting to defy the predictions of my "coffee grind reading" but she's intriguing. Maybe it's just that she's someone new, maybe it's cause a close friend of mine who knows her thinks we have a lot of similarities and she's been trying to get us in the same room since before New Years.... Either way, that finally happened this weekend, and while the situation was less than ideal, she still caught my interest. I've got less than no clue if it were the same vice versa, but I have a feeling if it was that I'll know about it in a few days time.

And now, I'm going to hopefully be able to wait and see the first episode of a new Firefly-based web series.

My resolution for 2010... is to grow an ego...

But not too much of one of course. Just a Goldilox sized ego and a bit of a thicker skin while I'm creating my wish list. Let's backtrack slightly...

I've been quite busy these past few months. Dragon*Con was 20-hours days of the most epic sci-fi/fantasy themed part that I had ever been to. For those who have never heard of or been there, it's a 60k person convention in the heart of Atlanta, Ga. Spread out over a series of 4 massive hotels, 24 hour a day programming from start to finish... if you can stay awake the whole time, there will be something scheduled for you to do. It was an amazing experience. The pannel for Browncoats:Redemption was an overwhelming success as well with our "street team" having handed out nearly 6,000 postcards advertizing the time and location. In a room that held 250 individuals, we packed it above fire code and had to turn people away. It was fantastic. It was riding high on a cloud the rest of the time.

Work got back in full swing as well. I'm finding an increasing dislike for the politics and supposed 'benefits' of state employment. It's changing me in a way that I am not taking kindly to. I see people, co-workers, who might work an average of a solid 9-10 hours a week out of a 35 hour work week. I look at myself, objectively, and see that at my 'best' week I might work myself between 20-25 hours. Somehow, that makes me look a head and shoulders above all the rest and a real 'enthusiastic young go-getter'. I'm increasingly disturbed by this. Disturbed enough that if I can find a simple way to get some kind of decent health insurance, even at COBRA rates, I'd take it and start from scratch. Yes, even in this employment climate. Maybe I'm a fool... but it'd one of the first employment (or lack thereof) choices that I've actually made myself rather than simply settling into what I've found myself in. [These thoughts are predominately in the "thinking out loud" category]

Big Apple Comic Con was more or less a bust. A day spent handing out a mere handful of cards and of all the special guests I was willing (or able) to pay for was Miracle Laurie who was an absolute doll, no pun intended. The nicest most down to earth I've met. She was the sole highlight of the convention.

Creation's Firefly/Serenity convention in LA was an experience not to be forgotten. Went out early to see an old friend, got to watch the new Star Trek movie on the bridge of the Enterprise D, went places and met people I'm not legally allowed to even tell anyone about yet. Love to go into more detail, really I would. But suffice it to say, I met just about all the actors that were there and then some. Solidified some friendships, made some new ones and memories to last it all.

As for what started this post... I've been watching a lot of tv/movies in the past month noting all kinds of inconsistencies, ways they achieved desired effects, critiquing story... looking at all of these things with a new eye. While I'm sure this is all due to my working on Redemption, it's made me all too aware that I haven't made good on working toward some of the dreams I had when I was younger. Ever since Babylon 5 I've wanted to make science fiction stories. That's most of the reason why I have the entire scriptbook colection and then some. My thought being" If I have the blueprint for this show, then I can use it to make my own from. It would be like having a walk-through to how it was done before so I could do it for my own while learning from the trials of others. I can see now it's not going to be quite that simple but the frame work holds albeit loosely. A lot of the behind the scenes that I've watched, directors interviews, creators diaries, etc have all talked about 'making the movie/tv show that they wanted to watch'. Perhaps it was Spielberg or Lucas who said it best, and I loosely paraphrase, if I make the best possible show that I want to watch then there are going to be others out there who are going to like it and watch it too. I can't imagine a writer making a living writing books on a subject or in a genra he or she abhors. I've gotta grow just enough of an ego so that I feel more than just a want, but a need to write the stories or shows or movies that I want to see, and to believe that others will want to see them too. Right along with that, the thicker skin that when someone doesn't want to, that's ok too. Most of my friends from HS would never be caught willingly going to Star Trek or seeing any of the hundreds of tv show episodes of various sci-fi programming that I've watched. I've missed out on workshops and conventions because I didn't have, or didn't have enough orriginal material to submit to be considered to invite (Viable Paradise I'm looking at you). I think it's about high time that I change that. So here's to unexpected and extra-ordinary new years resolutions, a right sized ego and a thicker skin. Welcome 2010.

A rough week

For whatever reason I just can't seem to shake whatever germ army I have floating around in my bloodstream. It's definitely a German or Swiss germ army though... very intense and very precise. At 9am every morning I've felt the headache come on, by 10am it's near migraine or migraine status, beats hard until about 4 or 5pm, and then retreats for the evening and quietly lingers not causing any pain, but reminding me it's still there. It's probably from just having been sick so many times growing up, but I don't do well with long, consistent illnesses like that. They tend to bring my ordinarily optimistic demeanor to a very abrupt dark pessimism. I've been getting by this time because even with the headaches still here, I can definitely feel the cough, sore throat, achy rest of the sickness has just about cleared up.

I'm unrealistically hoping that tomorrow(Saturday) will be my first really good day, because I'm going to be at a wedding and spending the night at a hotel. I'm about 3/4 excited and 1/4 nervous for tomorrow. I'm not in the wedding, or doing photography/video for it (which I do if anyone's getting married and looking for a photographer/videographer ;-) but it's a good friend of mine from high school, and a girl he met from his fellowship up at his school. A chapter of the exact same fellowship that was at my school. Considering the amount of contact I've wanted to keep in with that time in my life (about nil) and the fact that I'm going to be around more of them and more of their music and beliefs and conversations and 'traditions' if you will, than I have been in the last year at least, probably closer to two. Frankly, I dont' think that his wedding is the time or place to get into any of it, my current thoughts or simple lack thereof, so I'll say what I need to say and do what I need to do to pass and should someone be sensitive enough to see through it, then I'll call it fate and see where it leads. Might as well start discussing the elephant in the room....

Caught up on the TV shows I've been missing not having regular tv channels/DVR. In a short recap: Knight Rider, as much as I want to love it will probably be the earliest canceled show of the season, and rightfully so; Terminator, was fantastic as expected. The season premire had me bowing to Bear McCreary's musical genious for the whole first act, and by the last act my jaw was on the floor with the reveal of Shirley Manson's character; Prison Break, continues to add depth to already deep characters and totally earns the increase in viewrship it's been steadilly getting; Bones, continues to just feel real, dealing with interpersonal issues in a realistic manner. David Boreanaz is more amazing with each episode and as much as I didn't like him at first, Sweets is growing on me. Still a few shows I'm missing, but I can only watch so much tv for so long...

Reading however, ever since I got the Amazon Kindle, has been steadilly increasing to the point of taking time away from sleeping again. I imagine it'll simmer down eventually, but it's nice to want to read and have so many things to read again. All the paperback Star Trek series and other little books that I felt were a waste of space reading once and then storing, but wanting to have and not just take out from the library are now becoming mine. I can attach notes to lines or concepts in them I like and have all those notes magically appear in one file, it's delicious. A full post/review on the Kindle is still in the pipeline... just not sure where.

So here's to a hopefully better coming week. If I can just get through work productively, a few scheduled meetings passibly, and not be in pain/sick for the coming festival where I'll be rendevouxing with a few people I'm very interested in seeing again I'll be a very happy individual.