Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Choir concerts and missing the dead....

I missed my grandfather today, more than I have in a long time. This would be my father's father who lived in Florida until the time of his death. He came up to visit in when I was in high school, his next to last time up I believe. At the time I was either with K or on my way to being with her and we wanted to go do something with my grandfather. We decided since he said he liked music to take him to the all-eastern concert that was going on that weekend. We all piled in K's father's van and went to the show. It was one of the only things that I can remember that grandpa and I ever really did together and it was awesome. He loved the concert, and just couldn't get over how young the student's were and how good they sounded. My father said that he talked about going to that concert for months after. I purchased a CD of it and sent it to him, which he greatly enjoyed.

The point of this story, I guess, is that I went to another choir concert today and for one reason or another, I was struck with a feeling that grandpa would really have liked the concert and I wish he were there with me to see it. Don't know why it hit like it does, I guess with feelings like that we never do really know. I've been to plenty of other concerts since he died and none of them gave me that feeling... but I keep just going to back to the fact, that he'd have loved that concert.

E was glad that I came to see him conduct again. I've been to see almost every concert of his since he he was my student teacher. That's 7-8 years. I've seen his worst choirs, and his best choirs, bad and good song selections, the works. I may not quite comprehend why my coming every time means so much to him, but I can see it in his face every time he turns around and I'm there. There's so much more than just a simple "thank you, glad you came", it's much deeper than that, and it's a great feeling for me, even if I may not get it. He and his wife just had a baby girl, she's so freaking cute. I'm gonna give him a call in a few weeks and hopefully be able to get together for once outside of me showing up at all of his concerts.

And, I have to remember to write Tiny Dancer's letter tomorrow, I wouldn't want to let her down...